Three Qualities of Exceptional Mentors

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Positive mentors are the reason I am pursuing graduate school today. 

As an undergraduate at Virginia Tech, I was eager to get involved in research but unsure where to begin. I hesitantly reached out to one of my professors about joining his lab, and to my surprise, he enthusiastically welcomed me as a mentee. 

Since that first experience, every interaction I’ve had with science professionals has reflected that same intentionality and excitement. It has been refreshing and motivating to encounter such genuine support in this field.

Academia is a unique space for those of us driven by curiosity and discovery; however, it can also be intimidating, as the learning process often comes with a steep curve. As with any entry-level position, stepping into research for the first time can be daunting. The skills taught in lectures and teaching labs barely scratch the surface of what’s required for specialized research. I can attest firsthand that exceptional mentors are pivotal in helping new scientists navigate this transition and find confidence in their work.

The best mentors in my career have embodied three qualities: they are good teachers, they lead with grace and they are fully present.

Good Teachers Make Good Mentors

Being a good teacher is more than just understanding the material; arguably, that’s the easiest part. Teaching is successful only when the student truly learns, and because everyone learns differently, flexibility is essential. My undergraduate mentor was incredible at this. He could tell right away when I didn’t understand something and would explain it in a new way, sometimes multiple times, until it clicked, and he never got frustrated. 

Additionally, good teachers push their students to think for themselves. My graduate mentor did this by responding to my questions with more questions, guiding me to reason through problems rather than giving me the answer. At first I didn’t like it, but I realized he was helping me build confidence in my own problem-solving. Now, I use that same approach with my undergraduate mentee; it is incredibly rewarding to watch someone figure out the answer for themselves.

Leading With Grace

The best mentors in my life have also led with grace, a skill we do not always attribute to good mentors. I’ve broken my fair share of glassware, forgotten to record observations and asked the same question twice. 

One evening during my first year of graduate school, I was working late after a long day of failure after failure. I just needed to set up one last reaction before going home. While using my mentor’s prized syringe, the plunger slipped from my tired hands and I dropped it. My stomach sank. When I finally messaged him, bracing for disappointment, his response caught me completely off guard. He wasn’t upset. Instead, the first thing he asked was whether I was OK. 

His concern was so genuine that the weight in my chest immediately eased. He told me mistakes happen, thanked me for letting him know and quietly ordered a replacement without making me feel guilty or careless. Mistakes are inevitable, but how mentors respond to them makes all the difference. 

At this stage, we already know when we’ve made an error, and that alone is humbling enough. We don’t need anyone to point it out. My most memorable mistakes aren’t marked by embarrassment, but by the patience and understanding that turned them into genuine learning experiences.

The Gift of Presence

Finally, I have been fortunate to have mentors who make themselves fully present. Being available doesn’t mean holding my hand through every step; in fact, I believe coddling can be more detrimental than helpful. Instead, their presence has meant offering genuine attention when I needed it most. 

One of the postdoctoral researchers in my lab embodies this kind of presence perfectly. Even when she’s deeply focused on her own work, she turns away from her computer, gives me eye contact and offers her full attention the moment I approach her. In those small, intentional gestures, she shows that she cares not just about my questions, but about me as a developing scientist.

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This past summer, I applied for an NIH F31. Being the first person in my lab to take this on was daunting; I had to immerse myself in the grant-writing and submission process with almost no roadmap and very little time. The bureaucratic maze of formatting rules, submission portals and administrative requirements was overwhelming. But the postdoc sat beside me, sometimes for hours, helping me parse guidelines, troubleshoot forms and navigate confusing instructions. She set aside her time for me, and in doing so, she made me feel supported, capable and genuinely seen.

I am deeply grateful for the mentors who have shaped me into the scientist I am today. Let their examples serve as models for all of us on how to mentor others through teaching, grace and intentional presence.